Monday, Aug. 09, 2004 - 2:56 p.m.
Dear Diary,
Today Mommy #1 gave me my own room. Granted, it is under her loft so she can hear anything I do.
Drat. That means no porn.
She even put up very lovely posters in my room. Two are of that hottie, Orlando….Oh crap…I’m turning gay! I’m only a few months old! I can’t be gay yet! I still prefer breasts!!!
Mommy #1 gave me control of my own Mini Onion today. I made them change my soiled diapers for an hour straight. I’m all crapped out now.
Mommy #1 also tucked me in for my nap in my new crib that Mommy #2 bought for Mommy #1’s birthday.
I think Mommy #1 is lonely because Mommy #2 is away.
Or maybe Mommy #1 is trying to be a better Mommy.
No fair! I thought this was my own diary, now you two keep coming in here.
Good. She left.
#2 made me take a nap on her Legolas pillow. Please save me. They're trying to make me gay...
Mommy #2 says it's naptime again.
Orion.
